 If you find yourself to often, getting irritated about things you cannot control, so that it affects the quality of your life, or you may find yourself criticizing other people and their actions and even getting so very upset and frustrated to the point that your face gets all flushed and your heart rates increases and/or you are unable to speak , then it may be because there is some deep unprocessed anger or resentment inside your subconscious mind, that has not healed. It may be related to an early childhood, maybe you were not treated in a good way by your caregiver or you experienced some negative events, some violation, or perceived a situation to be threatening, and since you were too small and were no able to do anything about having your needs met, to express yourself properly or defend yourself in those situations, then you just put those powerful unexpressed emotions in the basement of your mind, where, even if you forgot about them, are still running in the background, controlling your behavior and affecting your health, by sending you repeatedly into a stress response, your personal and social life in a negative way.
You are aware you have this emotional issue and you are ready to do something about it, to let it out of your system for good and put all your conscious effort to control it and push it down even more, but so far it is still there and it still affects you negatively, against your will. So what can you do about it and how can you heal the root of this problem so that you can be free and be able to stay calm and at peace in any situation, even when someone may say something or act in a way that will trigger some negative memory from the past? Well, first of all it is a matter of forgiveness, you have to come to the conclusion that if you do not forgive then you are hurting yourself, since forgiveness is an act of self love that sets you free. It is not easy to forgive sometimes, so the most logical step you can do for your well being is to seek some experienced hypnotherapist that will help you set yourself free and heal the root of those painful subconscious cellular memories, using hypnosis. Yes, according to my knowledge and vast experience, hypnosis is the most successful and most effective way to, not to treat, but cure these annoying, unhealthy subconscious prompters. You can read more information about hypnosis here I would like to encourage you to post here below, any questions or share your personal experiences about this subject, if it resonates with you and any possible experience with hypnosis, negative or positive, thank you to edit.
9 Comments
Tatjana Smalkweski
9/22/2019 08:45:26 pm
Good post, my ex boyfriend had this anger issue which was also in a way a control issue, he was so controlling and used to tell her what kind of clothes she had to wear and if she did not do that he would get so angry even in public, humiliating her, it was so awkward, and whenever I would try to defend myself then I was the bad guy, he would accuse me to be controlling. 10/2/2019 07:59:54 pm
Hi Tatjana,, wow, thanks for sharing your learning experience. I would say that this person yes, he would have unhealed anger and un-forgiveness issues, but also a control problem due to probably a very traumatic and abusive childhood. Control has nothing with power or very high self-esteem, because is based on- and triggered by fear, it is a pattern that people who have a hard and painful childhood learn to develop as a protection mechanism, but it is based on fear, people who are controlling are very insecure since they feel their life is threatened unless they control everything and every person, which is impossible, that is why they end up being tormented and nervous and very stressed. so I am sorry for that experience, Yes hypnosis would have definitely helped him, however it has to come from him, only if a person is aware of his/her own emotional block, can healing start.
Tatjana Smalkweski
10/15/2019 08:13:09 pm
Thank you Annnalena, yes all you say makes so much sense, it is exactly as you explain it, he was very controlling, not just to me, but also I noticed even with other people, like he would get very angry when someone at the cash register of a supermarket could not say exact the right words he was expecting them to say, I could see he felt threatened by everyone unless he was able to control them. I agree it all came down to fear...but what I want to know, is, why do I still feel affected by it, how come that I feel angry when I think about and still irritated, do I have the same problem to some extent? :-) Do I have myself an anger or control issue that I need to take care of? Why is this still bothering me? What do you suggest I do to overcome this dis-empowering feeling? How can I use hypnosis to help me with this? Thank you
Alex J. Konstantin
10/30/2019 08:47:08 pm
Extremely helpful blog, I really appreciate all you guys are doing to make this input available. I would like to take the liberty to reply to Tatjana's question, if you don't mind, I understand what you are trying to say. I also, have resentment thinking back at how mean and how angry and controlling my ex-wife was and how I let her use that passive-aggressiveness on me, and many times during each day something reminds me of that, and when I do remember, then I also get angry and in a way my day is affected in a negative way..So to answer to your question..I think, yes, both you and me have some anger that is still there and that never healed, and resentment. However, I feel it is not control and it is on a different level and also different in nature, from the one your ex or my ex, were suffering from, even though...they were not aware, right? :-)
Anna Clorus
11/5/2019 07:08:01 pm
I wanted to thank you both first, Tatjana and Alex for your feed back, and Alex, thank you for stepping in and help us with your valuable input. Yes, I agree with you, you have some un-healed anger, based on the fact that you both were hurt and treated in a non deserving way by people who were supposed to love you, it is very normal for any human being or any creature, even animals, to feel that way. Normal reaction. It may still bother you because you have not done anything to heal from it, as Alex pints out, never found either the courage or time to start some healing, either through hypnosis or any other holistic approach. However the control issues that your ex partners suffered from it is different, it is related to fear and to other deeper negative emotions that have to do with childhood deep traumas. And they will always create conflicts in any relationship they will try to establish with any human being, they are in a way, limited in their potential of living as a functional human being, because of these deep wounds and it is harder for them to heal especially because they were not even a ware they had these issues, they were in complete denial, You at least are aware you have emotions to heal.. Acknowledging your own flaws or limitations is the first step into healing.. So yes, hypnosis, even maybe just a few sessions, should be able to take care of this for you, easily!!! Keep up with the good work, both of you!
Robert, J, Locharno
11/12/2019 07:23:51 pm
I read all the comments you posted, I agree with Annaleena, if we would consider any person who feels some anger when they think about the past and some wrong way they were treated by others, as dysfunctional human being, then, we are all dysfunctional. Of course it hurts if we all remember negative experiences, it is normal, it means we are humans and that our emotions are still working!! The problem is when instead people who have real control issue and deep anger issues, which shows by them getting angry and spiteful, very easily and very often, they are in denial, meaning they are not even aware they do have a big emotional issue, and since they are not aware, they do not do anything about it and so never heal! I am a counselor and NLP practitioner myself, and I think I have a profound view of these problems, due to that I have helped many of people suffering from this imbalances. So like Annalina says, you do not have an anger problem or control issue, it is normal to feel that way! I hope my feed back can contribute even a itt more to get clarity! 11/18/2019 07:46:21 pm
Robert, I appreciate your comment very much and I am sure all other readers do too. Yes I agree with your point of view, getting angry about a negative memory or even irritated about an inappropriate way a person might have treated us, it is normal. It does not mean that if we feel that way, we have a chronic emotional issue of control or anger. However, it is important to take into consideration that continuing feeling angry will eventually have a negative effect on our well being and emotional and mental health. So it is advisable to do all we can, to heal that resentment we feel toward the past as soon as we become aware of it. Using hypnosis or NLP or EFT is one of he most effective way, as you well know, to neutralize that emotion and heal it for good, so it wont be bothering us in any more! I hope this helps
Rob O'Brien
12/17/2019 08:20:44 pm
Very interesting conversation you have going on here, I am not sure I agree with all your posts, especially the last 2?? I ended a 4 years long relationship with my ex partner, few months ago, the main reason was actually that she had not forgiven me for something that happened long time ago and which never repeated again. Each time that it would come up she would get angry and resentful and sad at the same time, and even simple things like a song, or a color or a special voice, would rigger this negative memory in her and she would react in a spiteful way and would become angry and sad and this was really affecting negatively our relationship in a way it had become non-functional, so one thing lead to another and ti became too much.. So I am not sure that you guys do not really have any issue, I think that next time you get into a relationship, it will come up and you will see that you still have not healed. I would suggest some hypnotherapy or counseling for you, please fee free to object to my input! I am open Thank you Rob , and all of you guys, for your input, I appreciate it, I agree with Rob in a way, yes, anger is a bad beast, and unfortunately it does not just...disappear with time, as if by magic, it will resurface again, in a person behavior, the moment a similar emotion is felt, triggering a subconscious stress response, so Bob is correct that it is important to heal and process it immediately, with counseling or hypnosis or tapping techniques, I agree, Leave a Reply. |
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